03 10 / 2013
What i have been seeing these few months is like I have come to watch the behind the scenes of my great life….. Seeing the behind the scenes is so heartbreaking and sad for me…. The only thing I am glad is I have been appreciating the experience i am able to have and meeting all the people I have met with no regrets. I might have been complimented for being a great daughter because I actually know and appreciate what my parents have given me; but, truthfully, I can be the most selfish child to my parents, especially to my dad.
At this point right now, I don’t have much option to choose from. And, greatly is because I have decided to follow my dream before I realized how selfish this decision could be. I didn’t plan a backup plan for this decision so I kind of don’t have a turning back. Even if I do, it is mostly because I don’t want to pursue the backup plan.
It is either I don’t follow my dream and carry the weight of regret all the time or I follow my dream and stabbed the knife deeper on your back….
I feel so apologetic but, honestly, if I do follow my dream, then no matter how apologetic I feel, it all don’t matter; because I have already stabbed and left that knife on your back…
I’m not sure how long it will take for me to get over this whole situation but I hope something positive will happen to help soothe and loosen this situation a little more…
Send me the prayers…
31 8 / 2013
getouttahere, would ya?
24 8 / 2013
Honestly, I can understand that you are emotionally unavailable for your own family because of grandpa & grandma, but it really is unnecessary for you to say mean stuff that nothing can, or will, undo what came out of your mouth later on. I really could care less that you can’t express that you love me or your family directly, but you really shouldn’t act so frustrated and say things you don’t mean it in the long term but for the moment only. These words can hurt me and us, and once it’s been said and hurt, nothing can undo it or heal the scar that you left.
Do and act wisely please, would you? If you don’t want me to not respect you no more, you should respect that, regardless, I am your daughter and we are your family that you want to rely on later on.
It really is disappointing to see how you handle these matters so poorly. I really thought you could do better than this. Things that slipped out of your mouth tonight cannot be taken back any more. And they hurt. I feel different about you now, and I really can’t feel exactly the same how I felt and loved you before.
Farewell, my role model.